I moved out about 3 years ago. I guess it would still be considered moving out even though I only moved next door to my parents, into the attached apartment that they used to rent out.
For a while I was really excited about it. I got to decorate it my own way, buy my own furniture, come and go as I please. I bought a dog. I got to be alone a lot, which I liked.
But after a year or so, I started missing my old bedroom. Not really the house, just my old room. With my old twin bed pushed up against the wall, my Ikea desk in front of the window, all organized the way I liked it. My pretty dresser with my tv on it. My nice pink carpet. I used to love rearranging my furniture. I would spend hours planning out how to move things around, how to reorganize things, and cleaning everything as I went.
And now that I have a baby, I find myself missing it even more. Because before, I could have moved back home if I wanted to. My room was still there for me. It’s their for me now, but I have a new life now. I have a baby, I have a husband, I have a dog. I’m stuck over here.
I don’t know why I miss it so much or what I can do to make myself feel better. I hate it.
Most of the time, I just wish I could go back to the way things used to be.
I feel like I’m on a fast moving train, getting farther and farther away where I was, and there’s no stops in sight.
Mommy Needs Crack... 